A year has passed in a blink of eye and here’s a summation:
My bundle of joy, a baby named Charley. Becoming mum wasn’t something that I’d planned for. I also didnt think that I’ll be the first among my girls to get married and have a baby.
From a working married woman to a Stay-At-Home-Mum. I left my job role after maternity to better care for my little one. My parents and in-laws are getting on in age and I’ve no confidence in infant care after so much negative news on childcare. The ratio of 1:5 for infant care isn’t really converting me either. So getting back to the workforce would probably be on my cards a few years from now.. If I hadn’t become an obsolete antique in terms of knowledge!
Starting this blog and moving out of my previous blog that holds my memories since 2005.
Learning to let go. My grandmother passed away recently. I have been blaming myself for not being there for her physically during her tough times but I knew I had done my part as a grandchild. I hope she brought away with her those happy memories staying with us when she was well.
Hopping on to 2014, we would be getting our BTO keys next month! Waited for about 4 years to get this. Moving is a headache but we’ll get there.. More posts on renovations upcoming!
And so, here’s Charley first selfie of the year at 5 months old!
You know how most of the time most parents get so concerned about babies hitting their milestones..and when they don’t hit, they are not in the ‘normal’ range? Or your kid cant do his/her spelling when other kids her age could? I believed that society has moulded us into this so-called ‘kancheong’ and ‘kiasu’ parents (a hokkien slang) and this is a mental note to remind myself not to fall into this category.
Because every baby is different.
If we make notes of their progression by the books we are most likely not going to enjoy our baby. Why would I say that? Because comparison is indeed the thief of joy.
I was once in that category..and I behaved that way because Charley was drinking less milk than most babies her age would. I was actually comparing her with other babies. In fact, for a minute, I thought she was rejecting milk intake because while another younger baby was drinking 120ml consistently, Charley was only clocking a wide range of 40-90ml. That was about when she was 3 months-ish. I remembered I was so worried about her growth because her only source of food was milk and she was drinking so little! I was so stressed every time she refused her milk and it felt like I was forcing milk down her tiny throat. But well, I have a baby with character so she would actually turn her head away from the bottle teat or she simply doesn’t open her mouth. No joke. We even brought her to the PD to check out if there was any issue with her.. the milk powder or whatever. But nothing was wrong.
On another occasion, a young doctor had made a note in Charley’s health booklet and determined that she was having a head lag and needed to be reassessed on her next visit while I thought she was already doing quite well! This only meant that I had to live up with national standards and train my baby more often with tummy time so she’s progressing at the same rate other babies her age would. Talk about living in a rat race.
I hate it when people make comments such as ‘How’s Charley doing? Can she do her flip overs yet? Because so and so is already able to do that at this age!’ Well, if I could rebut with a quick reply I would have said ‘So and so can flip as much as he/she wants and join a circus! Charley can flip whenever she feels like doing so cause we’re not in a rush!’ I’m sure many parents are asked questions or given comments like these in similar fashion and it could really get nervy at times.
In case you’re wondering, Charley does her flip overs whenever she feels like it. Especially after baths or when she just woke up from her sleep. Just yesterday she flipped over and continue to sleep on her tummy! (We turned her over the min we saw her sleeping in that manner). Her head assessment was given the ‘green light’ during our last vaccine appt. Also, she’s clocking 110-120ml 4 hrly even though she’s pretty challenging to feed. Any amount will suffice as long as she drinks actually.
So I’ve learnt and come to accept that every baby is different. And i can only hope that my kid will love me the way I love her because I’m not a perfect mum either! If my kid compares me with a Supermum I’ll be so dead. So happy 5 months old (tmr) baby! Lets learn and grow together…at your pace 🙂
Weekends should be like this:
The other day I was hoping to win the voucher giveaway from Le Petit Society but booya, I didn’t get it! Congrats to the lucky winner. Also, I was a little upset not being able to take advantage of the little sale they have extended to their shoppers over the Christmas period since I’ve already done my purchases.. But this shall pass because I like shopping at their site!
So my parcel arrived at my doorstep:
The parcel was wrapped in this bubble wrap that protects the nice little box from scratches:
And when I opened the box, everything was so neatly laid out in the colorful box. Just looking at the box brightens up my day! (But of course I can’t just look at the box the whole day.. It’s not like an adrenaline fix.. Haha)
I would have reviewed my shopping experience sooner but I needed to do an exchange in sizing. The spaghetti bodysuits I’ve ordered looks a little too small for Charley. Seems like this piece runs a little small in sizing because I’ve purchased a ‘6M’ size meant for a 6 months old baby when Charley was only 4 months old. Nope, my little girl was growing by the charts so she’s not oversize! I must say that the customer service was pretty awesome at LPS! The guys did an exchange for me and gave me advices to get a slightly larger sizing so baby would be able to don the piece! On top of that, they allowed me to mail back to their Singapore address so I could save on the shipping cost! How nice of them isn’t it?
Usually I’ll just get really lazy to do mail backs because international shipping can get a little crazy (and I’m lazy!) but not this case! I’m definitely keen to shop again with these guys if something fancy catches my eye. 🙂
Here’s Charley looking happy in her top:
PS. This is a non sponsored ad. I’ve made the purchases on my own and my reviews are truly based on a personal experience.
I remembered those days where I was younger and our teachers often spoon feed us with answers. When I was much younger my mum spoon fed me because I couldn’t hold my own utensils yet. But how and when should we stop spoon feeding our young ones? Yes, we all know that we will always remain as our parent’s child even when we turn 50 but honestly there should be a stop to it?
An article recently on the Sunday Chinese paper mentioned that ‘A mum who knows everything will nurture a daughter who knows nothing’, vice versa. I believe that unless we stop spoon feeding then a child will always remain as a child even when they are 30. Such as picking the bones in a fish to washing and folding up one’s dirty laundry. Perhaps, if maybe one could learn to let go as a parent and let the child do things by themselves and at their own pace, then the child will never learn to do things on their own. Or say, taking you for granted. So, yes, let the child grow up. They will start appreciating things around them more.
Otherwise, just leave it to the spouse.
I’ve recently came across an article where a writer/mum writes about the these four words: This is only Temporary; which speaks about the happiness and depressions of raising a baby. Being a new mum (I considered myself fairly new since baby Charley is 4.5 months old), I can tell you that this is not an easy job. Being a SAHM is not easy, yes.. given the luxury not to miss any milestones the little one hits is pure joy but being at the beck and call of a baby who can only convey to you via crying can be quite a handful to deal with. Especially when you’ve got their wet diapers changed, fed, burped, slept and still crying.
But yes, this is only temporary. How many more disrupted sleep can one parent get? And yet, how long is this little one gonna find comfort in my arms? Very soon she’s gonna be all grown up and find hugs too mushy to deal with.
As much as I missed having a full night sleep, I am definitely not in a hurry for her to grow up. I am patiently waiting for her to take her time to grow into a fine lady.. for us to explore the world together as a family. Of course, when the time comes I can only hope that she doesn’t find me a nagging mum but a cool mum whom she’s proud of bringing to the clubs (yes, I am still secretly hoping for this to happen haha).